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Follow your heart this Valentine’s Day

Dating is definitely different in the age of technology
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Colwood-based matchmaking specialist Debbie Hartz was happy to share some thoughts on modern dating in a coffee shop

With the divorce rate in Canada hovering around 40 per cent, the odds you and that special someone will hang in for the long haul aren’t particularly promising.

According to The Queen of Hartz, however, if you’re looking for true love you can increase your chances of finding happily ever after by being aware of a few important points.

Debbie Hartz, owner of The Queen of Hartz Matchmaking Service, said before you embark on the dating scene, it’s important to spend some time examining what love specifically means to you.

“You need to know what your definition of love looks like before you can find true love,” she explained.

Dating can be challenging in today’s world, Hartz noted, especially because technology and online sites are much more mainstream for many people.

“Our lives have changed, we have less time to meet the right person,” she said. “We’ve moved away from ‘we’ to ‘I,’ as in iPhone … so much is based on a photo now that it takes away the emotion.”

For someone who has been away from dating for some time, Hartz believes it’s essential to identify your passions and be open to new experiences.

“Step out of the box, do some volunteer work, maybe take an evening class or get involved in a new activity that will provide an opportunity to meet like-minded people,” she suggests. “And don’t be afraid to do things alone.”

“Go out for dinner by yourself and leave your phone at home, be open to meeting people that way.”

Hartz doesn’t see the ratio of four women to one man in Victoria as an obstacle for either gender, as long as people are willing to make connections with groups that share similar interests. “Always smile first,” she added. “You’ll be amazed at how many people you meet that way who become friends or possible partners.”

Hartz said another problem in today’s fast-paced world is that people get intertwined too quickly, which increases the possibility of disconnects.

“When you meet someone you like who you want to get involved with, take the time to get to know them by proceeding slowly. If they’re not willing to take that time, don’t worry if the door hits them on the way out.”

The Queen of Hartz is a confidential, anonymous service that provides individual consultations that can range from one to four hours.

“A lot of people don’t like putting themselves out there,” Hartz said regarding her approach to matchmaking. “After I meet with someone, I try to match that person with choices they’ve identified and set up a date that’s comfortable for that individual.”

For more on The Queen of Hartz, call 250-818-4672 or e-mail thequeenofhartz@gmail.com.

reporter@goldstreamgazette.com